kristin has been a bad kristin
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
