dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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