Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize