Welp...herpes.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
