I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I just had sex on a roof
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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