before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
