I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
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Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
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Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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