Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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