covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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