I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
