can we get nightvision for the apartment?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Randomize
