But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
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What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
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You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?