can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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