Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
