Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
