Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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