is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
