i was rollin on her like bob the builder
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
