i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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