even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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