She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
