We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
whose parrot is this?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
