i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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