It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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