I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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