Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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