What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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