How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
