I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
