just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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