it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize