I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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