Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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