just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
