He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i will never coherently bang her
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
last night I used snow as a chaser
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
