i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
no you cant smoke seaweed
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
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apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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