I can't watch pbs sober anymore
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
