rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
