Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time