i wish starbucks made bloody marys
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
