if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You pole danced in your parka.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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