i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
