ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize