I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
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My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out