it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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