hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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