Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
