Got a toothbrush?
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
