they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
