Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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