Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
